Valentine's Play Date

I had a little Valentine play date party for G and a few of his friends. It turned out to be a lot of fun and really cute. I bought donuts from Krispy Kreme. Finding donuts that were not fried in peanut oil became my mission. I did not want to make donuts. I knew Dunkin Donuts didn't use peanut oil; however, they are over an hour away from me. 

I checked with our local little donut shop. They use peanut oil. I called Krispy Kreme headquarters to verify what type of oil they used. They use a vegetable oil to fry their donuts right on site. Perfect! There is a Krispy Kreme not far from our house. 

G and I headed there early before his party started. He of course needed to eat some of the donut as soon as we got into the car. I made a fritta and sausage to go with the donuts. I figured everyone would need something other than donuts. G wanted nothing to do with the other food. He just chowed down on donuts. 

I made cute little crafts for us to do. I bought some canvas from Michael's. I used painters tape for the LOVE. The plan was for the kids to paint the canvases, take the tape off and see LOVE. 

I bought the valentine plates and napkins at the Dollar Tree. 

After everyone enjoyed some food we pulled out the paints. The kids had so much fun painting on the plates and canvas. 

Then it was time to start to burn off some of those surgary treats! The kids played for a good 2 hours. Around 1pm G told everyone nite nite and headed to bed. He crashed for about 3 hours. Once he told everyone nite nite everyone decided to head home for nap time. It really was a cute day and a lot of fun! 

Wordless Wednesday

OOTD

I recently started taking OOTD pictures again. I need to start wearing all the clothes in my closet. I get in a rut where I just wear jeans and tshirts or sweaters. Our weather has been so beautiful lately too. This winter we had a TON of rain. I wore lots of cardigans with tees with jeans. Now that the weather has been in the high 60's or low 70's I have pulled out some skirts and dresses. This summer I want to wear more skirts. Sometimes it is hard to wear a skirt with a toddler. 

I spent a good portion of my summer at my parents last year taking care of my dad. I had a limited amount of clothes with me. This year I would like to wear more of the stuff I have in my closet. It also helps I have lost more weight, so all my clothes fit me again. I have actually had to get some newer things in smaller sizes. Skirts and dresses don't change sizes for me much if I go up or down 20 pounds. Pants on the other hand I have to change sizes. 

Tshirt: Target 

Shorts: Old Navy

Sandals: Birkenstock 

I recently got the tshirt at Target for $5. I really love their tshirts on the tables. They are reasonable and comfy. I don't feel bad if I ruin them because I get them for such a good deal.  The shorts didn't even fit me last summer. I couldn't zip them at all. I haven't lost that much weight since then, but I have lost a lot of inches. I bought the Birkenstocks last summer during Amazon deals. I had been looking at a pair on Ebay, but I found brand new ones on Amazon for the same price. 

Tshirt: Target

Jacket & Jeans: Gap Outlet

Sandals: Amazon

Tshirt: Gap

Vest: Old Navy

Skirt: Lularoe

Sandals: Target

Jacket, Tshirt & Shoes: Target

Jeans: Old Navy

Jacket & Shoes: Target

Top: Lularoe
Pants: Old Navy

Top: Kohls
Cardigan: American Eagle

Pants: Old Navy

Slippers: Amazon

I love this cardigan sooooo much! It is so incredibly soft. I recently discovered American Eagle clothing. I really love their jeans. They fit amazing. They also don't stretch out. I bought jeans, cardigan and a tee recently from them. They are my most worn items. 

Grief

I recently an article called Stifled Grief: How the West Has it Wrong. I feel I have had to deal with a lot of grief over the past years. I dealt with a lot of grief when I had multiple miscarriages. Sometimes that grief lasted a long time and other times it went away quickly. 

I remember when Adriana lost her mom. Her grief was so strong even months after losing her mom. She would talk to me about it often. It was hard for me to understand what she was going through. One conversation I remember us relating it to my miscarriages. I told her it wasn't the same thing as losing a mom though. She said it is similar because you loved that baby and wanted it so much. Part of me felt it still wasn't. Losing a mom that you have loved for years just isn't the same as having a miscarriage. There are such different parts of grief. 

Now that I have lost Adriana this is a whole new level of grief. I struggle with how long do you grieve and exactly how do you grieve at times? The article on Stifled Grief is really great. There are no guidelines on how a person is to grieve. I also never understood the grief she was going through after she lost her dad and mom so close together. She missed her mom horribly. I honestly thought time would heal her heart. Now I understand no amount of time can heal you after you lose someone. 

"Grief changes who you are at the deepest levels and while you may not forever be in an active mode of grief you will forever be shaped by the loss you have endured."

It is hard to believe that Adriana is gone. I have dreams often she comes back. Sometimes she comes back telling me she just had to get away for awhile. Other times we just pick up like she never left. It's only been 7 weeks yet it feels like 6 years. I really miss her! I miss her funny texts, snapchats, our conversations, our love of Chipotle and tacos, I miss texting her to set up a time to get together or sharing funny G stories with her. I miss sharing the bargains we found. There is just so much I miss. 

Wednesdays are hard days. I usually saw her every Wednesday. There are some days I just want to pop over and see her. Some days I go to text her only to see the last text I sent her "are you ok?" Ugh I hate seeing that one. 

"The reality is you will grieve in some capacity for the rest of your life. Once loss touches you-you are forever changed despite what society tells you. Stop looking at the expectations of an emotionally numbed society as your threshold and measuring stick for success. Instead, turn inward and look at the vulnerable reality of a heart that knows the truth about loss."

Wordless Wednesday

California Traveling

A couple of my cousins from ND came to visit. We traveled all over Nor Cal! San Francisco, Monterey, Yosemite, and back to San Francisco. 

Beach on 17 Mile Drive in Monterey

George had fun on his first trolley ride! He had to get on the side of the trolley like momma to hang off the side. 

Paleo Chili

I recently made a paleo chili. I have mentioned before how much I love soups. I usually can make the majority of soups paleo friendly; however, I struggled with chili. I had to just think outside the box. Instead of beans I grabbed a bunch of veggies. This is my version of paleo turkey chili. 

This picture doesn't do the chili justice. 

1 pound ground turkey 

1 pound zucchini cut into cubes

1/2 onion diced

2 cans of stewed tomatoes

4 cloves of garlic

1 bell pepper diced

3 stalks of celery

3 tablespoons of chili powder

1 teaspoon of salt

I cut up all the veggies and dumped them in the crockpot. I poured 2 cans of organic stewed tomatoes in, crushed my garlic, salt and chili powder in the crockpot. I didn't precook the ground turkey meat. I took the defrosted meat, broke it apart and mixed it into the chili. While it all cooked the meat cooked too. It really worked well plus saved time and dishes. You could use any type of ground meat. I happen to have turkey on hand, so that is what I used. I cooked it on low for about 4 hours. 

This was a really easy meal and very delicious! This would go great over a bake potato or some cauli rice. 

Hair Cut!

It was well over due for G to get another hair cut. I decided to take him to the place by our house. It was convenient and also only $8. I was worried he wouldn't sit there or would cry once they started. He sat in the chair like a champ. Never made a peep even when they used the clippers!

Wordless Wednesday

A week in the life of George!

Scooting around Nana and Pa's house! 

Swinging on the rings at gymnastics! This is his favorite thing at gymnastics! He would swing on them the entire 40 minutes if he was allowed. 

Enjoying a banana lounging in the Target cart as we head to the car! 

Hamming it up for the camera!

Found a comfy place to sit - on my head! 

Helping clean up the mess Nana made with the poppers! As soon as Nana started popping those things he ran to get the dust buster.