George's New Job!

Art helped run an additional store for about 3 months. Poor guy was working 6 days a week for months. One Sunday G and I went to help him out for a few hours. I told him I could easily do data entry, filing or some type of clerical type work. Well he found a project for me - 13 pages of data entry to input! I loaded the tablet up with some shows for G to watch, packed snacks and off we went. 

George helped Art put stuff away on carts. 

Took some phone calls. 

Drove around the warehouse. 

and did some shopping. 

George LOVES to go to Art's work. We were there for a few hours and we actually accomplished a lot even with a busy toddler. Thankfully Art is now just tending to his own store. He has also been short handed since before Christmas. He hired a guy who starts very soon. The long hours are hopefully coming to an end very soon! 

Change in Careers

I am not a big crier. It takes a lot for me to cry. One thing that makes me cry every time is reading Rory's blog This Life I Live. Usually I'm sobbing. I can relate so much to how Joey felt about not wanting to leave her little girl. 

Cancer is such a ugly thing. It takes people way too early. I didn't really worry about dying before I had G. I knew my friends and family would be sad if some thing happened. Having a child as you battle cancer is a whole other story. I'm not afraid of much. I don't like the dark and I get scared going into dark rooms. I'm terrified of dying and leaving my child. The pain he will go through and the sadness he will face tears me up. 

I've made some big decisions lately because of Joey. I have one life to live and I need to give my all to my husband and son. I could careless about a career. I've worked very hard to make it where I am in my career. Sometimes I think the things I was able to accomplish over the past year was God saying here you go I'm helping you accomplish these things, so you can walk away and be proud.

The weekend that Joey passed away helped me make a huge decision. That weekend I made a final decision I no longer was going to work. My life may be short, but I am not going to give myself to a job instead I am going to give myself to my family. Enjoying my moments left in this life. It has been one of the best decisions I have made for all of us. Within a few days I felt like a HUGE burden was lifted off me. There are times I have to remind myself I am not on vacation and I won't have to return to work. 

I have spent a lot of my life planning for the future and wishing for future events. Now I am enjoying the here and now. I will sit on our patio watching George spill bubbled all over the place. This is the moment in life where I use to dream of and hope for. 

Secret Service Guest List

Monday night I attended Stand Up! The 2015 Union Labor Party Banquet. My employer had a table at the event. The guest speaker was Nancy Pelosi. Let's just get this out here in the beginning of this post. I do not agree with her on any political points. Probably not one thing. 

It was fun to get dressed up and go to a fancy dinner. I rarely do that anymore. My goal of the night was to get a selfish with Nancy. I didn't think it was polite to turn around in my seat to take a picture with her on the platform giving a speech although I was VERY tempted. 

As Nancy walked in the door, sat at the front table a guy walks up & take a selfie with her. I gasp then busted up laughing. Who does that?  Bahahahahaha. Nancy smiled for the camera like it was no big deal. I wonder how many likes the guy got on IG? 

The mayor of San Francisco Ed Lee gave a small speech and Willie Brown. Willie was hilarious!  I've never seen someone leave a room faster than Willie Brown. I would like a lesson on skipping out of a place like Speedy Gonzalez. 

My name is now on the secret service list. Security was awfully tight in the building. 

Outfit details

Skirt - Target

Tank & Cardigan - Old Navy

Shoes -Nordstrom's

 

The Struggle is Real!

My new motto lately is "The Struggle is Real". I love every moment of being a mom. I can think of 3 exact times when I felt motherhood was a little too tough for the moment. I think that is pretty good for 8 months into motherhood. HOWEVER....It is a struggle daily to stay on top of things. There are days I just can't. I have been trying to give myself compassion and realize I just can't do every single thing. 

I look around my house and there are toys, clutter, dirt in the corners, dust on the furniture, dishes to put away, laundry to do etc. My most important thing I feel I need to stay on top of is clean floors...even that is a huge challenge. I can mop my floor and the next day G has dirt on his shirt from crawling cross it. Tile floors are just frustrating me at the moment. I have tried everything to keep those floors spic n span. 

I have one child....but the toys look like I have 2-3. I find toys under the couch, chair, in the kitchen, bedroom, and even my purse. Each night we pick up toys and put them in the baskets. Some how we just can't contain all these little toys. I am starting to think those toys are alive at night like Toy Story and move themselves all over the house. 

As I was running errands I realized just how much pressure women have on a daily basis. Just as a wife, mother and employee the numerous jobs that go along with those titles are out of control. We need to look like a million bucks on a fifty thousand dollar budge. That fifty thousand dollars needs to pay all the bills, buy groceries, save for retirement, save for college, new cars, and maintaining the million dollar womanly look. It's completely impossible to manage all that nonsense. 

I can't maintain a blog while working full time, carrying for an infant, trying to be a good wife and running a household. When I have time I blog. Most of the time it is a picture I am able to post from my phone. I don't even have time to read blogs anymore. I will catch a blog once in awhile if I see the blogger made a comment on FB or IG about their latest blog post. 

It was important to me that G was breastfed and boy oh boy was that a real struggle the first eight weeks. I had to work soooo hard to make it successful. I still have to work on staying on top of having enough milk. It also is important to me what he eats. I have made 98% of his food. There are times I have just had to buy jarred food. Guess what he has been fine too. I know I get a little crazy about what foods he eats because of my whole cancer ruckus. I just want him to be healthy and grow up to be as healthy as possible. 

You know what matters the most? The fact my son is thriving and super happy. That kid loves a good selfie or to talk to Nonna on Facetime. He sees himself and starts smiling away. Or when I pick him up from the nanny. I walk into the room and he lights up. In that moment who cares about the stressful conference call I just had. That smile fixes everything. Those dishes can stay in the sink, laundry can stay piled up in the basket and greasy hair will probably be covered up with dry shampoo yet another day. The struggle is real folks!

Menu Monday

This is my last week where I am working 1/2 days. On Thursday I return to full work days. The thought of going back to work full time makes me want to throw a tantrum like a 2 year old. I have LOVED working 1/2 days. It just works for me. I get sooo much done, I feel happy and it's the perfect balance for me. Unfortunately Art hasn't won the lotto, so I will be returning to full time. 

I have enjoyed making dinners at night. I have been putting stuff in the freezer for when I return to full time. I plan to start using them next week. This week I will cook dinners Monday thru Wednesday, Thursday use the crock pot and Friday possibly go out to eat or eat leftovers. 

Cheese Enchiladas with Salsa Verde

Split Pea Soup - recipe on the blog next Monday
Stew
Steak & swiss chard

We have got to use up our freezer stash. We have soooo much food in there! I have a lot of soups, raviolis, sausage, meatballs, gumbo, shepherds pie, and who knows what else. Next week will be all about cleaning out that freezer. 

Not Going Down Without A Fight!

Recently I had an issue at work where someone got their panties in a bunch and decided I was going to be punished. They made up their own rules as to how things worked in the company and thought they could get away with it. I decided I would handle it with the proper chain of command. I went to my boss and then to HR. It was all handled within moments in my favor.

The person who had their panties in a bunch didn’t realize I was going out to lunch with the CEO of the company the same day they were causing a ruckus. The panty buncher was a nervous wreck when they found out I was out to lunch with the CEO. The CEO never heard one word about the issue from me. Instead we talked baseball, grandchild, housing and various other topics unrelated to my work issue.

I came from a home where my parents fought the state on education and won. My mom fought good and hard to get a home school bill passed in North Dakota. She would get right in people faces at the capital talking about why she felt home schooling was right. She didn’t care if those people didn’t like her or her opinion.

It could have been much simpler for my parents to put their children on a school bus instead of fighting the state. They were told their children would be taken away, they couldn’t adopt, and they might serve jail time. Instead I watched my parents fight the battle of their life for their family. I remember that time very clearly as a 7 or 8 year old. I didn’t understand why they were so stressed out because I knew they would win. I watched my parents fight for what they felt was right their entire life.

What people don’t realize when they mess with me is I have been through a lot more than your average 32 year old. I am currently in the fight of my life fighting for my health. Every day I fight to find the best care, find a way to feel like myself again and beat cancer. I came from a home where you fight for what is right no matter what! I am married to a man who has fought for our freedom. I am not going down without a fight!

This Crazy Busy Life!

Boy life has been crazy lately!

• Bart descided to strike due to their union contract which made it a nightmare for 400,000 people each day trying to get to work. This week I have gotten up at 4am, drove to the ferry and took it across the bay. Thankfully there was a holiday in the mix and I was able to recover partially one day. Bart is claiming to be up and running by 3pm today. I sure miss my friend Bart!!!!

• I am helping with another department at work for the next couple weeks. I am trying to get everything organized and running properly, which is a HUGE task. I have been working 10-12 hour days.

• Dealing with MTC, crazy commute hours and extra work hours is a major challenge at the moment. I am trying to keep everything running, but some areas are failing. The blog has been put on the back burner for right now. I told my mom I would make a website for her new store and I haven't even been able to start it. I hope to be back on track the week of the 15th.

Bart Strike

Well the Bart strike happened. I was convinced it wouldn't happen. my opinion changed on Saturday when I heard the union side walked away from the bargaining table. The deadline for the new contract was the end of the day Sunday. 

I negotiated my first union contract this year, so as a pro I find the union actions unacceptable!  You do not walk away in the middle of negotiations. Around 400,000 people take Bart every day. Now these people are forced to find other ways to work. 

I took the Ferry bright & early this morning. I was out of bed at 430 arriving at the Ferry at 530am.  I was worried the parking lot would be packed. I parked in the front row. There were around 40-50 people in line and another 40 people got on the ferry once I was on. 

I am not looking forward to a 4:30 wake up until Bart gets their acts together. 

People lined up for the Ferry. 

The news was interviewing! Where is my mom because she would have been in front of that camera! 

Pictures from Last Week

Last week one of my employees brought Vietnamese sandwiches in for lunch. These things are AMAZINGLY delicious! Yummy meat on a crunch baquette topped with veggies. Oh these things are one of the best sandwiches ever!

I spent the night at my friend Julie house. Her dog finds my butt a comfy pillow!

I looked outside my window because I heard A LOT of talking below. The entire front of the building had TONS of people. I guess Charles Schwab had a fire drill, so everyone gathers in front of our building. Luckily they made it snappy and got back to work. lol

Lacey bought a Relay for Life bag in my honor. The bag will have a candle in it lighting the trail for the walk. It was so sweet! I feel so honored to have my name on that bag as a cancer survivor!

Unanswered Prayers

The other day I was laying on the couch thinking of some unanswered prayers I'm thankful stayed unanswered. Have you ever listen to Garth Brooks Unanswered Prayers? It's a great song!

I'm thankful for all the crazy exs that stayed unanswered prayers. God really has blessed me with an amazing husband. We've had our bump in the road just like everyone else. He has taken such great care of me over the past 3 weeks. Stood by my side, been my cheer leader, remained positive through numerous tough doctor appointments, sat by me in the hospital, took care of me after surgery and loved me each step of the way. He takes away the stress of all this cancer.

My normal process after I leave the doctor and get some tough news is I cry on the way home. That's my time to think the worst, get my emotions out, and have a woe is me moment. Art sits by as I have my moment using crying away. Then he reminds me of the what ifs, the positive things, how God is going to get us through this and cancer won't beat me. I go through these emotions before I call my family & friends to give them an update. By the time I make my phone calls I feel positive again.

I made the mistake of not going through my process when my mom was visiting after a rough doctor appointment. I got soooo angry on the way home I yelled at her. Instead of yelling I should have let myself cry. I didn't want my mom to see me cry or not be strong. Instead it backfired on me.

Another unanswered prayer was my job. I had been looking for a new job. A place I interviewed with started dragging their feet in November. I got irritated with why weren't things working out. Why wasn't God answering my prayer? Well thank goodness that prayer wasn't answered. I needed my Cadillac insurance plan. We have only paid $20 for all the doctor appointments, surgery, hospital, prescriptions, lab work etc. Yes, that is right twenty dollars!!! I pay a large amount each month for insurance, but in the long run its paid for itself.  It would have been awful to start a new job & go through cancer. We could have switched to Art insurance, but would have had hefty co-pays.

Those are the 2 major unanswered prayers that come to mind. Some times we get frustrated with the fact we feel God is ignoring us. In reality he knows what is better for us in the long run. I have stepped back lately to look at the bigger picture. 

Psalm 27:14 (KJV)
Wait on the Lord: be of good courage, and he shall strengthen thine heart: wait, I say, on the Lord.

Pictures from Last Week

Last week my boss brought me flowers to thank me for everything I do. Made my day!

Sammy relaxing! Avoid looking at the camera incase the flash goes off. 

Sailors were in SF! =)

Longshoremen

Recently my employer just acquired a new client longshoremen of the West Coast. While Art and I were on our cruise around the Bay I snapped some pictures of the Port of Oakland. I sent my boss a picture and told her our lives were about to change forever because of these people. This is a HUGE client for us and we are very excited. I am hoping to get a tour of the Port of Oakland one day soon.  I felt like an ant next to these huge ships and containers.

3 Years

Today 3 years ago I finally had enough and walked out of my job.  I haven't regretted one single day of my decision. I feel it was one of the best decisions I have made.

Today is a day to celebrate! I will not ever put up with someone treating me so poorly ever again.

March 31 - 2 Year Anniversary

Today I celebrate 2 years of taking back control of my career and making one of the best decisions!!!! Last year I wrote about what a difference one year makes.  Two years later I still don't regret my decision of quitting my job!  I will celebrate this day for the rest of my life.  I stood up for  myself & I haven't stopped. I gained great confidence & keep pushin on!  My great Aunt Mary use to tell my grandma & mom I would one day be the first woman president.  I don't think I will be the first woman president (Hillary will probably beat me lol), but I know I can take on anything!

Office Subway Art

How cute is this office subway art?  You can find it here. I change out a holiday subway art constantely in my office.  I love this one though.  So adorable!

Cleaned the Kitchen at Work

Our office is currently moving. Today the other supervisor and I cleaned out the kitchen. Look at this pile or garbage. It was NASTY!!!!!! I have been threatening to call in the TV show Hoarders. This is how every room/cubicle has been that I have cleaned.

One Day......

I would love to have just one day...just one where everyone didn't argue with me. It seems that every day one of my employees questions everything I say or do. I think I have been argued with or questioned 100 times together alone.

I threatened to jump out the window at work today. A friend said the worst thing that would probably happen is you would get a broken bone. Immediately I thought of laying on a gurny with a line of employees asking me questions.

TGIF!!!!!!

March 31

Today I woke up with a spring to my step. As I was getting ready to head out the house I thought how different one year makes. Last year I spent 30 minutes pacing around the house. One year ago today I quit my job and entered the unemployment line. I did this during one of the worst economical times. I was at my breaking point with my former boss. I packed up my office and headed out the door never to look back. It was the BEST decision I have ever made!!!! Not one day have I regret walking out. Even when I had no idea if I was going to find a job and money was tight did I think oh I shouldn't have done that!

In the past year the week long headaches, stomach aches, crying and screaming has come to an end. My husband no longer suffers from me flying through the front door on my broom. If I do fly through the door on my broom it's because of some crazy people on Bart or in my 4 mile drive. I no longer receive phone calls from work on vacation, on the weekends, at night or early in the morning. The day before my wedding I received a work call as I was running around like a crazy person...can you help us get this report done. ARE YOU SERIOUS!?!?!?

I quit my job on the day my husband was promoted. What timing. He was worried how we were going to make it and why I couldn't find a job before quitting. If you have ever been at the end of your rope that is maybe the only way you could understand what I did. I didn't fall off the rope....I tried a knot and held on. Best knot I've tied at the end of my rope!!!!

I was unemployed for 2 months, found a job for 3 months and then came to work for my current employer. I now have a WONDERFUL boss who shares my name. She treats me like a respectable human.

I feel like the past year has actually been 2-3 years instead of just one. It has taken me almost a year to get over some issues. I spent 8 years of my life at my old job and my life revolved around work.

Tonight we will have a celebration! Every year we will celebrate March 31 as a wonderful day.

Back to Work

Back to work I went today. I only worked 4 hours since the end of business on Decemebr 23. I thought I would do some work over the holidays...try to keep up with emails. Ummmm no such luck! I only came back to 212 emails. That wasn't bad at all. Usually on a good day I get 50+ emails. I am still trying to play catch up with the emails.

It felt good to get up and get ready for work today. Getting out of bed was the hardest part! Once I started to get ready it felt nice to dress up. I packed my new work bag last night, wore my new red coat and packed my new shoes! I think this is the first time I have worn heels to work in 8+ months. Lacey got on my case that I am starting to act like an old married woman. I have to step it up!

I have been at work now for over 5 hours and I am not ready to jump out the window. =)
I am thankful I have a job to come to in this economy. I have one of the best bosses!!!! I came into the office to show my parents where I worked. She asked me a question and then said you have more important things to do than worry about this go enjoy your family. WHAT!!!! I have been thinking about my wonderful boss the past few days. She honestly is a great boss!

Well back to work for me.

Smile!

On my way to work each morning there is a little old homeless man standing in the same place every day with the biggest smile on his face. Everyone morning we greet each other with Good Morning. On my way home he is in the same place again with a big smile. We say good night. This man always looks so happy. One day he had on a hoodie sweatshirt with a bunch of bling. He looked so proud of his new hoodie. It made me laugh.

Someone gave him a banana one morning and he was soooo happy! This morning I was thinking we all need to be more like him. Smile and greet people. I can have 100 things on my mind walking to work, but I always smile after I see him. If he can be happy and homeless I should be able to be happy.