For This Child I Have Prayed!

When we first got married I felt it was important to wait a year before we started a family. We started trying to have a baby right a few months after our first anniversary. I've blogged about our struggles quite a few times. 

It has been a struggle for almost five years. We have an army of children waiting for us in heaven. I always picture getting to heaven & nine little kids jumping up & down excited to see me. Each of those babies I had hopes & dreams for. I prayed for everyone of them. I cried every time we lost one. The hurt I felt over every miscarriage was just so deep. 

There have been times I just couldn't understand why I had to go through so many miscarriages. It was so frustrating to me that women on drugs, abusive parents and teenagers were cranking out kids. Here am I begging God to just give me one baby. 

Then 2013 came along with a whole other set of struggles. There was a time I considered never having children because of cancer. I struggled with is it fair to put a child through this burden? A wonderful doctor at UCSF told me move on with your life, have children & enjoy life to its fullest because something else other than cancer will probably take me. This started a whole conversation between Art & I. We decided to go for it & try to have a baby. 

I have dreamed of the day I would get to make this blog post. I am currently 16 weeks pregnant with a healthy baby BOY. I  due September 17. 

Two reasons I believe I'm pregnant. 

1. God heard my prayers for 5 years. He put me through so many trials. I've really tried to learn through those trials. The miscarriage in October 2010 is what made Art & I start going to church. I'm not sure we ever would have gone to church if we hadn't been through that trial. 

I read this verse the first part of 2014 & I just started crying. Elisabeth was considered barren, but God gave her a child. I clung to the second verse when I found out I was pregnant. Nothing is impossible with God. It got me through tough days when doubt would set in. 

And, behold, thy cousin Elisabeth, she hath also conceived a son in her old age: and this is the sixth month with her, who was called barren. For with God nothing shall be impossible. (Luke 1:36, 37 KJV)

Prayer it works!  My parents prayed for me over 33 years ago. Around 28 years ago I started praying for a brother or sister. Four years later we got Lacey. 

For this child I prayed; and the Lord hath given me my petition which I asked of him: (1 Samuel 1:27 KJV)

2. I truly believe my thyroid cancer was causing the miscarriages. The doctors can't confirm or deny it. My gut tells me this played a HUGE part in my struggle. 

The blog has suffered majorly since I've been exhausted and sick. I am not complaining but happy to have these symptoms. 

I will write about telling our family, nursery ideas and weekly pregnancy posts. I have waited my entire life for this moment in time. I couldn't wait to get married as a little girl just so I could have a baby. I've wanted to be a mom since I can remember.

Today we found out we are having a little boy. It was a moment I won't ever forget. I always had little boy dolls and wanted boys. I screamed, clapped and then cried when they said it's a boy. It was worth everything over the past 5 years for this very moment! I would do it all over again if it brought me right here to where I am. God is good! This child is truly a miracle and I thank God for this baby every day.